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Tuesday, March 6, 2012

Memories

I'm remembering odd things today. Things from past lives, most likely. But that usually only happens rarely, and when I'm asleep. Rain thinks it's because I'm more sensitive at this time in the month, and I can't help but note that that's a good point. Still, I find it odd. Especially just how powerful some of the memories have been. Feelings and premonitions especially. I was in tears because I had lost a loved one I couldn't remember. It was frightening.

I keep remembering washing bandages in a stream, mixing salve and tending wounded. I remember sleeping on furs and the feel of icy wind. Of snow crunching. Of tracking game. Of bruises on my arm from a grip that was too tight. Being manhandled, my hair being pulled. Of having someone important taken from me. Crying in the dark at night. Pain through my whole body like a fire.

Whichever life I'm remembering, it was a happy one that went horribly, terribly wrong during a time of war. I think this was a life that I knew Rain. Maybe he's the one that was taken from me.

I had glimpses of an earlier time, as well. It's one that reoccurring and I think it was especially traumatizing. Someone very, very important to me had to go off to serve in a war. And I knew they were going to die. But despite all my pleading, they wouldn't stay. So they left and they died and I died inside. It's more clear now, the separation. I hate it. I feel like it might've also been Rain in a past life.

I don't really know, I'm just speculating. But I have a feeling I might be right. Before Poseidon was in this dream, though, but then it was probably a dream. Now, when I'm awake, it's clearly a memory. And it's not entirely the same. So I can't connect them definitely.

'Till next time.

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